Forget day of the Triffids, Ace Dave and I have been
fighting ‘Blight of the Bamboo’ in our mainly gravel back garden. The house was bought with an immaculate
landscaped gravel type design. A pebble stream, reclaimed railway sleepers
and slate stepping stones were wonderful. Oddly a small patch of grass neither
big enough to mow, or small enough to keep weed free has central position in
the garden, and it’s dandelion overgrown mess greets me each morning through the kitchen window.
For the last 3 years we have been chopping back bamboo as it
spreads under the gravel, that stuff is impressively stubborn to remove without
breaking nails, backs and causing domestic arguments. Sam dog finds any venture
by his owners into the garden as reason to play endless hours of fetch with
toys long ago buried under the evil grass, and inevitably two weeks after a
cull the damned stuff is sprouting new bamboo shoots.
The eucalyptus tree died
in the bad winter two years ago, and despite Ace Dave and my father attacking
it with a chain saw it defiantly stands barren in the corner of the garden, and
appears to have started growing leaves from the bottom of the trunk, so maybe it
isn’t dead after all, we also lost 3 cordylines, one still remains depressed
and full of spider webs and the odd crisp packet by the side of the house.
Our front garden, the size of a small parked car- and occasionally
it is used for just that, is also gravel, following the complete massacre of
the established shrubbery and bushes by me, and then properly by a qualified
professional last summer.
In his opinion, Ace Dave believes we should extend our
dilapidated decking area to cover as much of the back garden as possible, for
what reason I am unsure as he dislikes flies, spiders and the general outdoors
. I am of the opinion that if we remove all the gravel and bamboo and put grass
down the dog will be able to enjoy the grass, we will hold idyllic picnics and
BBQ’s in our back garden- I may even have pretty lights and lanterns, and most
importantly I will pay someone to come and maintain the lawn.
Now that the sun has finally decided to shine I am reminded
that we have a rusting BBQ and wouldn’t it be nice to clean it up and use it? Obviously
I am thinking this because Tesco subliminally planted the idea in my head
whilst food shopping yesterday with their ‘BBQ’ ready packs of meat.
As we have not yet reached a consensus , our garden
continues to hold us to ransom and now we are not just invaded by bamboo but sticky
weed and chickweed, I have reluctantly pulled up enough to fill our brown bin,
and will attempt to clean the BBQ before Ace Dave returns home, if I fail we
will be cycling to the pub for a pint and a burger.
